In the fourth quarter of Wednesday night’s win over the Bucks, Knicks fans thought they were going to catch a glimpse of something more rare than Sasquatch, the Loch Ness Monster, and Jerome James playing meaningful minutes combined: a Steve Novak dunk (check out the 1:25 mark of this video for proof). Obviously, Novak is known as a bit of a one-trick deep threat (83% of his field goal attempts with the Knicks have been three pointers). So when he actually managed to get a steal near mid-court (career average 0.6 steals per 36 minutes) with an open lane to the hoop, I found myself holding my breath and preparing myself to accept the majesty of a Steve Novak dunk as it burrowed it’s way into my irises, with the hope that the image would be permanently seared into my retinas. Alas, we were not so lucky. Well, apparently, Steve caught some flack for it on twitter, and has taken a solemn vow to work on his dunking. We are all very familiar with Novak’s “Discount Triple Check” antics. However, if he’s going to be adding a new wrinkle to his game, I have some celebration recommendations he might want to try out.
What I love most about this one is that it would be a team exercise. It would be exciting to see which Knick was assigned to which role. I would like to nominate Rasheed for the seat (he’s got the bulk to handle it) and J.R. Smith for the handle bars. It’s also pretty exceptional that one of the roles is “guy who claps for the bicycle and runs alongside it.” Fantastic.
I will only accept this if Steve insists on doing the entire 45 second dance. I don’t care if it leads to a layup on the defensive end and then a shot clock violation (or, more likely, a late-in-the-shotclock J.R. Smith 20 foot fade away) on the ensuing Knicks possession, that would still be a zero-sum game in terms of points and we’d have a clip that would literally break youtube. Bonus points because Steve Novak could probably pull this dance off, unlike….
…this clip. Whereas the genius of the David Brent dance is the “every man” nature of it, watching a very large Midwestern fellow trying to emulate the fleet-footed bedimpled heartthrob that is early 90′s Mario Lopez (who am I kidding? Mario Lopez is still super dreamy) would be gold. Also, this dance is approximately 14-15 seconds long, so he could probably just bang it out real quick while he’s standing in the corner guarding the other team’s least threatening offensive player. Not a bad option.